the beginning of the end

there's something about today that seemed off - everybody seemed giddy and you can hear the mutterings of people as they pass by. a lot have speculations about the announcement this afternoon - some may deny it but it has been news that has been floating around for a while ... hmmm, like for the past 1.5-2 years (lol!). surprisingly, there was free meals at the cafe today - not that i needed it since i sort of have an abundance of meal stubs. but its free, and i'm filipino - and we should never refuse grace when it hits you in the face. in hindsight, it seemed like feeding the people was timed maybe to soften the blow.

at 2pm, it was announced - the Big Blue is closing --- in 6 to 9 months. i think the timing was what hit the people like a brick wall. We knew it was coming but we didn't know it was that soon. in a way, for those tenured, the "enhanced" separation package is very attractive. i, who has been scouting for other opportunities, sees this as an additional blessing. it was very emotional during the q&a, some broke down and others asked direct, poignant questions. from my point of view, the real reason is politics and eversince i felt that that "somebody" never really liked the site. he said it was performance last time, and now they say the building is no longer viable structurally in the long term. for a company that prides itself on being strategic, that line of reasoning doesn't make sense. listening to the questions, i felt a pang of guilt that i was looking forward to this news. i wanted a confirmation so i can start to move on but others would have preferred never to hear this kind of news.

from what was shown, for my tenure, the package isn't bad. but money doesn't last a long time and it would be a gift to find a job as soon as the package is available (God willing!). in more ways, God has been very gracious - maybe the reason i haven't heard back from the companies i am applying for is because i needed to wait for this package. i get a bit anxious at the prospect of not having work, having been employed for the last 12 years. life would be easier if i had to think about myself only - but there are 4 people i need to feed and thank God my sister is working again.

the news is going to hit the others hard. i can tell because everyone looked teary-eyed leaving the room. for most, it is really the beginning of the end. hopefully for most, there's a new beginning that awaits.