is 60 the magic number?

i went to my tita's wake last night and realized that she passed away at the age of 60.  its the same age by which tita rory passed away at a few months back.  that kinda stuck to my head -  rationalizing that if 60 was the life expectancy these days then i am already past mid-life.  i'm quite happy that i'm alive and everyday i am thankful that God has given me another day here.  the thought of mortality doesn't really worry me now more than before probably because i've kinda dealt with the passing of people who were much much younger than me.  going through that has made me realize that i am lucky i'm still here - thirty four years and counting.  for some reason, writing that in numbers make me cringe and i'm hoping that putting it into words make it less obvious that i am quite aged. lol.

being in the wake somewhere in mandaluyong city made me reminisce of my childhood.  almost all of my cousins lived there except for some who lives in muntinlupa and us who lives in paranaque.  i couldn't believe how grown-up my nephews and nieces are already that i had to sigh when they came around to bless and say hi.  WTF?  i'm so not that old - or so i thought!  i realized that as the world turns, my nieces and nephews are now either in their late teens or even entering adulthood.  one nephew (who married early) is now even expecting his fourth child.  the next generation has indeed taken over our role as the kids in the clan from way back.  its not really that our time has passed that's depressing but more of the generation prior to us (the 'rents, the aunts and the uncles) are all sort of getting much, much older.  and that they are going to be with us a few more years seem more and more definite and real.  its one of the main reasons why working outside of the country is my least priority - i'd want to spend as much time with my loved ones because they are the people who mean a lot to me.

so while i struggle with the idea of turning another year older this 2009, i smile at the realization that i am living a fruitful and happy existence.  that i have learned my lessons well and i've made a difference in the lives of some people i know.

life goes on.  i'm here and i am still living for the here & now.

a sad farewell

my tita lita passed away today.  she has been quite sick this year but last time we saw her, she seemed to be in better shape after she got out of the hospital.  my cousins just said she was having trouble breathing and rushed her to the hospital.  they texted a while back that she has moved on.  i'm not really sure what was wrong with my tita but it had something to do with her liver (and no, she is not a drinker).  while we were not particularly close with her, i do have some memories growing up because we used to hang around the mandaluyong area way back.  their life has been a constant struggle to make ends meet and there were surely good times and bad times equally.  despite everything, she seemed happy and content with her life and my tita was a kind woman.  she went to visit and look after my sister when she was at the hospital as well.  its sad that she has to go already but i know that she is going to be happy in the next life.

its raining now.  maybe the heavens are sharing their grief for the loss of my tita.

its going to be CHRISTmas again

in a few more hours, its going to be CHRISTmas all over again.  why is at the start of every year, we all just want the months to breeze through so that its december again.  and when it does breeze through, we wonder where did the time go?  sometimes i don't know if hoping for the days to pass by so that it will be weekend again is a good thing.  life passes by - this year is no exception.  i'm happy though that i am still here --- and so is everyone in my family.  God has been very good and extremely generous to our family and despite everything that has happened in the last couple of years, we are still very thankful.

tonight, we are going to celebrate the birth of Christ and we all should remember that Christmas is more than just giving gifts.  It is a time to be thankful for the year we had and for all the blessings we have received.  Happy birthday Jesus!

To everyone, Merry Christmas!

a dsl miracle

persistence kind of pays off - and of course, a whole lotta patience.  i called my pldt dsl contact last week to tell him i've been having the same problem again of intermittent dsl connections (which was really screwing up my having to work from home set-up).  last time they replaced the modem and all the connections and checked whatever pldt boxes on the lamp posts but that didn't really solve anything.

i think he finally re-routed or transferred our line to some other new line and after a few more adjustments, it "seems" like the problem of intermittent connection is now a thing of the past.  i'm crossing my fingers that that is really the case.  but so far, speedtesting my connection, here is the result (and its been pretty consistent) so you might say, i'm quite happy.  truly, a dsl miracle.  3MBPS ... gotta love that!

what language is this?

after receiving a call from an unknown number who like most uneducated people just rudely drops down the phone without uttering a single syllable, i receive this text a few minutes after.  written as is.

... sori poe ...

-->rngclL akoh...

_->enxia s istorbo...

i had to read it a couple more times to understand what some of the words were and realized that OMG, they're all around us.

it took a lot of willpower not to reply with something like ...

what planet are you from and what language is this?

i have to say, this is like haunting me! hahaha

how not to write

one of my pet peeves is text writing and all the pa-cute way some people change how words are spelled (aq, q, ngaun, cno, etc).  i don't really care if anybody calls me a snob but writing this way is heinous and they should get locked up in writing school - like maybe for eternity.

don't you wish the telcos bring back free texting so that people don't have to write this way. instead of ngaun, why not just write "now" and for cno, why not "who"?

uhmmm if anybody who reads this write this way, i beg you to stop.

yesterday's deeds

nonsense stuff i did yesterday ... well sort of nonsense ... wala ma-post e ...

• got 5 1/2 months worth of meal stubs ... so i bought 1 box of 500ml C2 Green and 1 box of 500ml of C2 Apple and 1 case of Pepsi Max (24 cans) from the cafeteria yesterday.  I know they sell it way expensive but what will i do with so many meal stubs?
• additionally, got around 8 small cans of pik-nik (love the salt!) + a bunch of snacks + a bunch of instant noodles again from the cafeteria.  i sure hope these are not going to be our noche buena and new year feast.
• thought the gas in cavite was pretty cheap already (P34.5 per li for unleaded) and then joey told me that it was P30.5 at Jetti.  so i got gas at the Jetti station i passed by and was happy that 1K pushed my meter from 1/4 to full. yeba!
• passed by a CD-R king store at filinvest last night and since i was passing time (dang coding!), i decided to fall in line for 30mins which was unusual for me because i dislike waiting.  Got 50 pieces of DVD+R and another 50 pieces of CD-R.  staple items.

and so still i haven't done any christmas shopping - i'm really really bad at it.  again, the only person i'm great at shopping for is myself.  i'm such a shellfish person ... hehehe! and since this is a season of giving, i'm going to brave the torrent of people at the mall and find gifts.  so far, i'm not really sure when i can do that ... lol!

phase 1 farewell

i went to the cavite office today thinking it was just another one of those days and wondered as i was alighting at the parking lot why the night shift (7pm-7am) crew were hovering taking photos at the lobby and everywhere else.  i realized after buying something for breakfast looking at the LCD announcement screen that today was the last day of office (LDO) of Team 1 as part of the Phase 1 reduction.  i could feel an outpouring of emotions - some happily braving the future, others obviously sad to leave the company.  it dawned on me when i reached my cubicle that it also meant the last day i will be seeing friends & colleagues who i have worked with for the past eleven years and are part of phase 1.  last day i'll be seeing arlene at the office.  last time i'll be seeing ms zeny (who worked for intel for i dunno, 35+ years?).  i didn't even know some other colleagues were also leaving.  i was kind of sad that a lot of people were leaving.  that meant there'll be a lot more empty cubicles when we go back in january.

phase 2, which i've signified my intention of being part of, will probably have a LDO of April.  nothing really specific yet but i should start planning for it.  i hope i can take the next couple of weeks to get things straight in my head.  in between the merry making and the shopping and the endless get togethers, i have to make sure to sort of put some time to it.  hopefully, 2009 is going to be a great year.

review : breaking dawn

i'd have to say i wasn't disappointed by the final chapter of the twilight saga - in a way, it was a fitting conclusion and most of what i have been hoping for had closure.  i was thinking though that there were some parts of the book that felt like it was being stretched out particularly at the beginning.  i was happy to see that bella was no longer the wimpy, hapless girl she always seemed to be the first 3 books.  i'm happy that the edward-bella-jacob story was laid to rest.  c'mon, was there anyone seriously rooting for bella & jacob to end up together.  it was bella-edward all the way.  that was the whole point of book 1 (twilight) wasn't it?  to condition us to the whole "meant to be together" forever for bella & edward crap.  i would have settled for a climactic battle scene but the confrontation towards the end sort of left a little more to be desired for.  i almost feel bad that i don't have anything more to read tomorrow since i've been reading the books one after the other for the past four days.  i think the "sweet valley high" feel of the book stopped at the third book and the fourth book was darker and more serious than the rest.  it would be thrilling to see it the big screen but i bet we'll have to wait six or more years to find out.

review : eclipse

finally finished "eclipse, book 3 of the twilight saga and i liked it so much better than "new moon" which deathly boring.  eclipse has a better storyline and puts to a close somewhat the plot that the author was building up from the second book.  i guess the importance of book 2 was building up the jacob storyline and creating the arena for a love triangle.  i have to admit that the turn of events had me less liking bella - she's turned into a wimpy, hapless girl which i guess she really is but come on, she's always the freakin' damsel in distress.  i wish jane could've used that pain illusion on her - take that beyotch! lol!  i have to admit i enjoyed the action towards the end of the book - i think that will be joy to watch in the big screen when its made into film.  i do hope they pick out some good looking guy to play jacob so he'd be a better match to edward.  so book 1 was intriguing, book 2 was a sleeper and book 3 was pleasantly surprising.  hopefully, book 4 is a worthy conclusion to an enigmatic tale.

freakin dent

sure i've had my days as a really bad, bad driver but most of the time, i've been a model citizen following all the traffic rules so it pisses me off to see that my car has a freakin dent when i parked it properly in mostly pay parking areas.  i know its bad to wish someone ill fortune but i do hope that someone who put a dent in my CRV gets what he/she deserves.  the dent isn't humongous, well it sort of jumped from door to the back but its pretty noticeable.  while i'm not car-obsessed, the OC in me gets "praning" everyime i'm reminded of it.  the last time i had a dent repaired (ok, that was bigger and deeper), had to shell out 3K for it despite the insurance and that was 3 carless days and i had to commute from the repair shop.

so yeah, it sucks and it sure pisses me off.  dang that stupid driver.

new hardware this friday ...

ok, just happy that finally i am going to get my new desktop this friday ... specs are pretty cool, and definitely meets my requirements.

Intel Core 2 Quad 2.4Ghz

Intel(R) Desktop Board DG31PR Motherboard

Intel(R) G31 Express Chipset

3.0GB DDR2 Memory

Multi-Card Reader

512MB GeForce 8500GT Video Graphics Card

Intel(R) Graphics Media Accelerator 3100 onboard graphics

6-channel (5.1) audio subsystem using the Realtek* ALC888 audio codec

Gigabit (10/100/1000 Mbits/sec) LAN subsystem using the Realtek* RTL8111-GR Gigabit Ethernet Controller

320GB Serial-SATA/150 Hard Drive 7200rpm

DVD-ROM Drive

LG 20x DVD Dual Layer Drive

Firewire Card

Microsoft VISTA

I can't wait for friday!  Technology really makes me giddy!

i want these chucks

waaah, i want these clear chuck taylors!  they're so cute!

a glimpse of the coming future

en route to tagaytay with arlene, i realized that after eleven years of being with the big blue and working together, we are going to part ways - maybe for good this time.  eleven years is a long time - enough to build a friendship that hopefully will last our lifetime.  next week is the week before the two-week factory shutdown so it means that those who have been identified as part of phase 1 are all going to pack up their stuff already and bid the office goodbye.  i wonder how i would feel when my turn comes and my last day of office draws nearer and nearer.  despite the occasional jitters and overthinking, i am actually at peace with my decision to retire from the company.  i know the risks involved but i know that right now, i need to find something new and exciting.

so maybe i'll have to face my destiny as early as february, or maybe april, or maybe june.  i don't really have any definite answer right now and i am still patiently waiting.  i remain hopeful that things will work itself out.  it always does - with faith.

Reflections on the PSN Photo Exhibit

(this poster courtesy of malou marquez)

Yes, we did it!  All the hard work paid off and i'm proud to say we managed to pull it off.  For the record, i never doubted we would not be able to do it despite all the hurdles we encountered.  The problems, the frustrations and the stress were all part of the journey when we signed up for it so i had my head in the right place.  And while i pulled out the photo i submitted prior to printing, i do not mind not having an entry in the photo exhibit.   I already learned a lot helping manage the details of the exhibit.

What everyone should be proud of is the fact that this wasn't just a so-so exhibit - we partnered with an international organization (check out Up With People) and with the well-recognized Rotary Club and i think we did well enough to be proud of our accomplishment.  PSN wasn't just text in the thank you's - we had our logo as PARTNERS and we were always mentioned in all of the mini-concerts they did around Manila.  Yes, WE - a relatively unknown organization managed to score such a well-recognized event.

I was chatting with the RCGM President last night and fighting off exhaustion to be socially active, i had the feeling he was satisfied with the outcome our our exhibit.  He mentioned that they (RCGM) are going to bring in UWP next year and said we should start to talk about it.  This one's not over yet and seems he trusts us already to help partner with the next. Yay for good impressions!

Despite the highs, what project isn't complete without the lows?  Definitely there were a lot of frustrations trying to work out this project.  Words are said and people get hurt.  Personally, i don't burden myself with grudges nor hate because there's enough of that going around the world.  People who feel they have not done their roles should just apologize and do better the next time.  That should be the end of it.  There are a lot of lessons to be learned from this event and it is a chance to reflect on who we are as a group and as individuals.  I hope everyone understands why words, strong as they are, had to be said.  We all just need to admit to our mistakes if we made one.

I remember while i was in Singapore following up and reminding people to start shooting pictures during the UWP arrival and i managed to catch AJ on YM.  He was checking to see what is happening and during our conversation, i sort of ranted about some of my frustrations.  He realized sort of that he had responsibilities to the project as well and i told him "If you want to make it up, go shoot and cover some of the UWP events!"  What do you know?  AJ's photos actually turned out to be one of the great pictures in the set.

There will be more opportunties for us (PSN) in the horizon and it will surely rests upon our shoulders whether we make something of it or squander it.

But just the same, congratulations to us!  We did it!  And even if things did not go along as planned, we learned a great deal during this photo exhibit.  The next one is going to be spectacular!