life | time out

it feels good to be out of the metro for a change.  its one of the things i miss working in the faraway land of cavite - the absence of the rush of city life.  i should slap myself for saying that but really, intoxicating as it is, it gets overwhelming sometimes.  still the traffic and busy-ness is much better in mckinley hill versus that of the heart of makati - so i'm thankful for that already.

at least for the next three days (today included), this team building/training offers a brief respite from the city.  and the holiday inn @ clark is quite lovely.  flat screen tv, fancy beddings, free food - nothing really to complain about.  feels like i'm living by myself already - perhaps a prelude to life in 2010 and beyond.  got my mac in tow and a surprisingly reliable globe tatoo to keep me connected.  i'm all good.

its going to be december next week.  christmas is here before we know it.  mom's turning 70 next month and i don't know where we should celebrate her birthday.  i want to be able to treat her to somewhere fancier than usual.

despite everything, life is good.

missin' somebody much though.

life | day 321 & 322 - night outs

the drawback of working in the metro is that it can get pretty expensive - the lifestyle is pretty different from the laidback, rural scene of say, cavite where i used to work.  the plus side of the metro though is that socializing has never been on an all time high - i see more of my off-office friends nowadays.

work has been quite steady the past few days.  to borrow jowell's words, its "relaks lang."  not that there isn't any stuff to do, let's just say they're not as complicated as a few months back.  maybe because the year is winding down and the problems are more manageable.  still crossing my fingers that this "peace" lasts until the end of the year.

spent tuesday night with my good friends lemon and mj.  dinner at john & yoko was good and we, at least for the night, ditched our diet plans and feasted on a "there goes my diet" platter.  hahaha bad influence.  i can't believe that despite our thin crowd, we managed to hang out, talk about stuff until past midnight.  that's what i love about lemon and mj, we really never seem to run out of things to talk about.  having them to talk to that night was comforting so yay for great friends.

3 hours of sleep and i was back at the office wednesday.  still happy that there's no coding here in paranaque or in taguig for that matter.  busy wednesday.

i just had a dose of reality today and a realization that you never really know someone until you know them.  ok, that didn't seem to make sense.  i guess what i'm saying is that sometimes we get so caught up with what we only know about a person that finding out a few more details turns out they were not as perfect as thought they were.  i'm not being judgmental - all i'm saying is that sometimes knowing the "bad" can help you get over the illusion.  basta yun.  still groggy so i'm having a hard time saying it.  lol.

had dinner with ex-bench friends tonight at the stock market.  chardonnay.  brie.  pasta.  best key lime pie (i had in a long, long while) and flourless chocolate cake.  yum.  its amazing we're still friends until today - how long is that already, 13+ years?  its really amazing when you find true, lasting friends.  no matter how little we see each other throughout the year, when we come together you just know you're in the company of good friends.  i hope our plan to travel out of the country works out.  that'd be fun for sure.

still groggy today.  i think there's another dinner tonight.  i told you this "sleep-deprived" lifestyle is challenging.

life | day 320 : defective

so blogging on a daily basis doesn't seem to be something i can do which is understandable with me trying to wrestle with my body's inability to sleep in one continuous block.  but hey, i write when i can and when it inspires me.

watched 2012 with the gang last saturday.  movie was alright - plot was too thin for me but the effects were darn good.  not surprising that malls seem to be packed with a lot of people these days - weekends specially.  after all, christmas is really just around the corner - 39 days to be exact.  my early christmas shopping plans never really pans out so i'll have to wing it again this year.

for some reason, i was craving for some refreshing becky's lemon squares last saturday.  so i drove to manila (near la salle) to buy some - actually took the liberty to buy some for the gang as well.  pairs nice with coffee.  it was refreshingly delicious.  comfort food.  yay.

i decided to see an ENT today because my sinus is inflamed and i have been having trouble breathing normally the past two, make that three weeks.  Doc told me it was a polyp and i have to take some steroids for the next couple of weeks to see if the inflammation subsides.  If not, he may need to surgically remove it.  bummer.  i should just tell people i'm getting a noselift instead.  that'll make for better conversation.  ok,  i'm starting to think my body is defective.  maybe the warranty has expired or i'm one of those models that's been recalled.  LOL.  hope the meds work.  please please work.

while in mmc, i took the time to visit a good friend who just gave birth to her second daughter.  she told me her name and i know the initials are J & A but i can't remember (memory loss).  baby looks adorably cute.  i super love kids.  they're all just so loveable.  looking at all those babies really can brighten up anybody's day.  I know cause when i saw 'em, overwhelming joy.

here's one song i'm so loving off john mayer's new album "battle studies" ...

More Free Music at MP3-Codes.com

life | day 314 : tuesdays with u1

anything after monday gets an ok in my book and yesterday was no exception.  things was going along smoothly workwise and i was humming to christmas songs the whole of yesterday.  life has been real busy lately i forget that Christmas (my favorite time of the year, i had to say that) is just around the corner.

i've been pre-occupied lately and its driving me insane.  i've been having ups & downs on a daily basis its really starting to stress me out big time.  its not a good thing.  its been hard to focus lately and i know i just need to really really keep myself busy.  tiring to the point of exhaustion is always a quick head fix.

i was planning on jogging along boni highstreet last night but that plan got sidetracked because of an unplanned dinner with my surfer buds.  ER is visiting and he has been such a cool bud it was a crime not to shake plans and have dinner with him & the rest.  its great that we still manage to find time to hang out despite all of our busy, busy schedules.  we've been friends for quite a time and we've managed to stay that way even after we left the old blue.  we're all adrenaline junkies at heart - willing to try anything and mostly everything.  its what i love about the group, no qualms and no inhibitions.  jump if we need to jump.

the other thing that's a bit sucky lately is my sleeping habits.  i can't seem to get a good night sleep lately.  where's the sand man when you need him?

read this from a friend's blog yesterday and "OUCH" hit me like a rock thrown from the roof top.

“Because i'm hoping i'm wrong. And every time you do something that tells me you're no good, i ignore it. And every time you come through and surprises me, you win me over, and i lose that argument with myself, that you're not for me.” - The Holiday

i'm praying to please please stay out of my head.

life | day 314 : tuesdays with u1

anything after monday gets an ok in my book and yesterday was no exception.  things was going along smoothly workwise and i was humming to christmas songs the whole of yesterday.  life has been real busy lately i forget that Christmas (my favorite time of the year, i had to say that) is just around the corner.

i've been pre-occupied lately and its driving me insane.  i've been having ups & downs on a daily basis its really starting to stress me out big time.  its not a good thing.  its been hard to focus lately and i know i just need to really really keep myself busy.  tiring to the point of exhaustion is always a quick head fix.

i was planning on jogging along boni highstreet last night but that plan got sidetracked because of an unplanned dinner with my surfer buds.  ER is visiting and he has been such a cool bud it was a crime not to shake plans and have dinner with him & the rest.  its great that we still manage to find time to hang out despite all of our busy, busy schedules.  we've been friends for quite a time and we've managed to stay that way even after we left the old blue.  we're all adrenaline junkies at heart - willing to try anything and mostly everything.  its what i love about the group, no qualms and no inhibitions.  jump if we need to jump.

the other thing that's a bit sucky lately is my sleeping habits.  i can't seem to get a good night sleep lately.  where's the sand man when you need him?

read this from a friend's blog yesterday and "OUCH" hit me like a rock thrown from the roof top.

“Because i'm hoping i'm wrong. And every time you do something that tells me you're no good, i ignore it. And every time you come through and surprises me, you win me over, and i lose that argument with myself, that you're not for me.” - The Holiday

i'm praying to please please stay out of my head.

life | day 313 : if it was that easy

monday started off without a hitch.  i was off to a good start for the week - no monday blues!  i was giddy.  the weather was sunny.  i had a feeling of unbelievable lightness in me.  yay for that.

it was a typical day workwise.  documents to sign, meetings to attend.  it wasn't slow and it wasn't fast - so it was somewhere in between.  steady lang.

my first day back at the gym was a bust.  i did my usual abdominals and moved on to get my heart pumping.  5 mins of super cardio and i stopped - heart beating too fast i felt like i was going to blackout.  losing consciousness in a full-packed gym is social suicide so i decided to stop.  5 mins is better than nothing.  note to self - "take it slow."

a good friend sent me this quote - "if you love someone, tell them, because hearts are broken by words left unspoken."  OUCH.  yeah, slap me in the face will you?  seriously, if it was that easy but i've been brainwashed as a child to believe in fairytales.  i deserve another slap for that i guess.  its complicated.

going to the gym got me all fired up.  adrenaline pumping.  didn't get to sleep until midnight and magically woke up at 3am --- yeah, the witching hour.

sleep deprived.  still happy.  how wrong is that?

life | day 313 : if it was that easy

monday started off without a hitch.  i was off to a good start for the week - no monday blues!  i was giddy.  the weather was sunny.  i had a feeling of unbelievable lightness in me.  yay for that.

it was a typical day workwise.  documents to sign, meetings to attend.  it wasn't slow and it wasn't fast - so it was somewhere in between.  steady lang.

my first day back at the gym was a bust.  i did my usual abdominals and moved on to get my heart pumping.  5 mins of super cardio and i stopped - heart beating too fast i felt like i was going to blackout.  losing consciousness in a full-packed gym is social suicide so i decided to stop.  5 mins is better than nothing.  note to self - "take it slow."

a good friend sent me this quote - "if you love someone, tell them, because hearts are broken by words left unspoken."  OUCH.  yeah, slap me in the face will you?  seriously, if it was that easy but i've been brainwashed as a child to believe in fairytales.  i deserve another slap for that i guess.  its complicated.

going to the gym got me all fired up.  adrenaline pumping.  didn't get to sleep until midnight and magically woke up at 3am --- yeah, the witching hour.

sleep deprived.  still happy.  how wrong is that?

life | day 313 : if it was that easy

monday started off without a hitch. i was off to a good start for the week - no monday blues! i was giddy. the weather was sunny. i had a feeling of unbelievable lightness in me. yay for that.

it was a typical day workwise. documents to sign, meetings to attend. it wasn't slow and it wasn't fast - so it was somewhere in between. steady lang.

my first day back at the gym was a bust. i did my usual abdominals and moved on to get my heart pumping. 5 mins of super cardio and i stopped - heart beating too fast i felt like i was going to blackout. losing consciousness in a full-packed gym is social suicide so i decided to stop. 5 mins is better than nothing. note to self - "take it slow."

a good friend sent me this quote - "if you love someone, tell them, because hearts are broken by words left unspoken." OUCH. yeah, slap me in the face will you? seriously, if it was that easy but i've been brainwashed as a child to believe in fairytales. i deserve another slap for that i guess. its complicated.

going to the gym got me all fired up. adrenaline pumping. didn't get to sleep until midnight and magically woke up at 3am --- yeah, the witching hour.

sleep deprived. still happy. how wrong is that?

life | day 310-312

friday would have been a typical work day except that workwise, we are in the middle of planning week.  the meetings were painfully long but the one good thing about it is that people at the office are mostly easy to deal with.  we finally managed to break-in the pingpong table we recently bought (out of donations) and i have to say its been years since last time i held a table tennis racket.  rusty is all i can say about my playing skills.  dinner didn't push through with lem & mj because they got stuck at their shoot down south.  its friday and traffic on a friday is pretty lame.  i, on the other hand, got home in good time.

saturday was kind of busy.  i always try to do all my errands during saturdays so that i won't have to worry about them the next day.  the downside of saturday is that everybody seems to be thinking the same thing so traffic is bad.  and i do mean b-a-d.  the best thing about saturday though is that its cheat day - so i don't feel guilty eating rice.  i finally managed to see the gang during miggy's birthday dinner.  i really miss 'em.  unexpected surprise Ü dunno why but it seems we never run out of stories to share.  got home at 5am.

woke up at 8am.  bummer.  why can't i sleep for 8 straight hours like other people?  felt sluggish the whole day trying to psyche myself into sleeping - to no avail.  i finally managed to pull myself together to do the groceries.  S&R is a haven.  i just really love it there.  there's a lot of people but it doesn't feel claustrophobic.  slept like a baby sunday night.  yay.

its monday.  i feel lightheaded.  might be cause i had a great weekend, sleep-deprived not counting.  feels like there's some good news ahead.  or it might just be me, because i can't stop smiling.

life | day 309

work has a way of bringing you to places you know existed but probably will never go to.  case in point is the customs office somewhere near the manila port.  the building itself is alright but the road going there is treacherous and i would never for the life of me venture out there at night.  work has brought me at its doorstep for three or maybe four times already.

being there is like being in a movie - lots of characters.  i sometimes have to ask myself if this is an office because it looks like one but on one side are people eating, a kid sleeping on top of the desk, its one of the busiest government offices i've been to.  eating is big here.  i always see various people lugging around pots, chicharon and a bunch of other edible stuff.  it actually is a fun experience being there - the parade of people make up for the lackluster surrounding.

dinner last night was supposed to just be a good serving of greens but somehow got drawn into ordering additionally a rack of baby backs.  to top it off, a good serving of delicious what was it?  mud pie ... there's really nothing to cap off a nice meal and take your mind away than an ice-cream like dessert.  comfort food.  looking back, my need for comfort has always been about two things - ice cream (vanilla bean rocks!) and shopping.  the latter of course being a much much more expensive alternative.  but then again, haagen dazs also doesn't come cheap.

there's probably another great news, workwise, looming in the horizon but i'd stay mum about it for a little while because i believe in the saying "nothing is final until it is final."  make sense?  basta yun.  all i can say is that i'm getting giddy thinking about it and its driving me crazy figuring out my choices.

my calendar is booked solid 9-4pm in meetings.

its friday today.  thank God for that.

life | day 308

this cold that i'm having won't leave me.  it likes me too much.  i'm hoping that the herbs (whatever they may be) the chinese doctor gave me works because they're pretty expensive.  i'm trying out eastern medicine for a change.  please please make me a believer.

the other new thing i tried yesterday was acupuncture.  good thing i don't have any needle aversion because one poke really hit a nerve my body jumped in place.  it was an experience - a bit boring because after the needles were placed, there was 15 to 20 minutes i was trying to observe what has happening.  boring as it was, i have to say it actually works.  my lower back doesn't hurt as much but i'd need 3 to 4 more sessions.

when you're trying to figure out things, sometimes the answer actually comes staring back at you.  this is a realization this morning - me, having been hung up with a certain someone now know its time to give up.  i really can't do this again because a part of me keeps on dying everytime.  a good friend is right, fairy tales don't happen, at least not for us.

looking at my calendar, november is b-u-s-y.  i can't figure out where to squeeze in some christmas shopping.  dang.

where's an "eternal sunshine of the spotless mind" when you need one?  i need one.  like now.