life | day 310-312

friday would have been a typical work day except that workwise, we are in the middle of planning week.  the meetings were painfully long but the one good thing about it is that people at the office are mostly easy to deal with.  we finally managed to break-in the pingpong table we recently bought (out of donations) and i have to say its been years since last time i held a table tennis racket.  rusty is all i can say about my playing skills.  dinner didn't push through with lem & mj because they got stuck at their shoot down south.  its friday and traffic on a friday is pretty lame.  i, on the other hand, got home in good time.

saturday was kind of busy.  i always try to do all my errands during saturdays so that i won't have to worry about them the next day.  the downside of saturday is that everybody seems to be thinking the same thing so traffic is bad.  and i do mean b-a-d.  the best thing about saturday though is that its cheat day - so i don't feel guilty eating rice.  i finally managed to see the gang during miggy's birthday dinner.  i really miss 'em.  unexpected surprise Ü dunno why but it seems we never run out of stories to share.  got home at 5am.

woke up at 8am.  bummer.  why can't i sleep for 8 straight hours like other people?  felt sluggish the whole day trying to psyche myself into sleeping - to no avail.  i finally managed to pull myself together to do the groceries.  S&R is a haven.  i just really love it there.  there's a lot of people but it doesn't feel claustrophobic.  slept like a baby sunday night.  yay.

its monday.  i feel lightheaded.  might be cause i had a great weekend, sleep-deprived not counting.  feels like there's some good news ahead.  or it might just be me, because i can't stop smiling.

life | day 309

work has a way of bringing you to places you know existed but probably will never go to.  case in point is the customs office somewhere near the manila port.  the building itself is alright but the road going there is treacherous and i would never for the life of me venture out there at night.  work has brought me at its doorstep for three or maybe four times already.

being there is like being in a movie - lots of characters.  i sometimes have to ask myself if this is an office because it looks like one but on one side are people eating, a kid sleeping on top of the desk, its one of the busiest government offices i've been to.  eating is big here.  i always see various people lugging around pots, chicharon and a bunch of other edible stuff.  it actually is a fun experience being there - the parade of people make up for the lackluster surrounding.

dinner last night was supposed to just be a good serving of greens but somehow got drawn into ordering additionally a rack of baby backs.  to top it off, a good serving of delicious what was it?  mud pie ... there's really nothing to cap off a nice meal and take your mind away than an ice-cream like dessert.  comfort food.  looking back, my need for comfort has always been about two things - ice cream (vanilla bean rocks!) and shopping.  the latter of course being a much much more expensive alternative.  but then again, haagen dazs also doesn't come cheap.

there's probably another great news, workwise, looming in the horizon but i'd stay mum about it for a little while because i believe in the saying "nothing is final until it is final."  make sense?  basta yun.  all i can say is that i'm getting giddy thinking about it and its driving me crazy figuring out my choices.

my calendar is booked solid 9-4pm in meetings.

its friday today.  thank God for that.

life | day 308

this cold that i'm having won't leave me.  it likes me too much.  i'm hoping that the herbs (whatever they may be) the chinese doctor gave me works because they're pretty expensive.  i'm trying out eastern medicine for a change.  please please make me a believer.

the other new thing i tried yesterday was acupuncture.  good thing i don't have any needle aversion because one poke really hit a nerve my body jumped in place.  it was an experience - a bit boring because after the needles were placed, there was 15 to 20 minutes i was trying to observe what has happening.  boring as it was, i have to say it actually works.  my lower back doesn't hurt as much but i'd need 3 to 4 more sessions.

when you're trying to figure out things, sometimes the answer actually comes staring back at you.  this is a realization this morning - me, having been hung up with a certain someone now know its time to give up.  i really can't do this again because a part of me keeps on dying everytime.  a good friend is right, fairy tales don't happen, at least not for us.

looking at my calendar, november is b-u-s-y.  i can't figure out where to squeeze in some christmas shopping.  dang.

where's an "eternal sunshine of the spotless mind" when you need one?  i need one.  like now.

happy | tired

i honestly didn't know there was a typhoon over the past weekend. i woke up amidst the heavy rains thinking it was another "bed" weather but soon realized the gravity the non-stop rains were doing to other places in the metro. the heavens literally wept non-stop and any reprieve from the rains weren't forthcoming. it is amazing that in this age, the abundance of information flooding twitter (which i have really grown to love) and facebook is truly astounding. amateur videos and photos flooded cyberspace and those kept people abreast of what was happening beyond the comfort of their homes.

times like these is when you see the humanity of people's spirits. malou & i decided to volunteer at world vision in answer to miggy's request for help last monday. repacking sacks of rice ain't easy - the sacks were heavy, the deed was laborious but everyone were in good spirits. i felt happy being in the company of such generous people (jan, marjo, jm, anjo and malou). i told malou that there is a natural high knowing what we were doing is for a worthy cause - that in some way, it affects the lives of people in a positive way. charity does that and its probably why a lot of people do it - food for the soul.

i got pulled into an early morning tuesday when i barely just arrived at the office. it was again some volunteer effort for the company to check some of our employees who were also badly affected. it was a good thing my schedule was a bit light during that day so taking the day to help out was forgivable. we did the groceries. we did the repacking and off we went. i was assigned to my colleagues in the marikina area and we passed by familiar roads and i couldn't help but feel moved by what i've seen. marikina riverbanks (mall) was in really bad shape. there was debris everywhere and muddy cars being towed. along the roads were people busy with a lot walking still muddy. you've seen it in videos, pictures and television but being there where it all happened felt frighteningly surreal.

both my colleagues who we visited are okay. they've started clean-up and slowly going back to their normal lives. it was a frightening experience for both. we see these things happen in the provinces and think really nothing of it until it happens in our lives. its the only time we realize that these events can happen to anyone. what happened with "Ondoy" is a tragedy and i hope that we learn something from our mistakes.

the past two days has been tiring. but there's a feeling of happiness and relief with it. so if you are free - donate or volunteer somewhere. there's still a lot of people needing help. Go!

hiatus

i woke up today feeling heavy hearted. its probably because i still felt exhausted despite the hours of sleep i had last night and my body ached and my head was throbbing. i'm getting more of these headaches lately and its likely because work has been a bit demanding. i was spaced out through most of the day but miraculously managed to finish some of the more urgent deadlines. tomorrow's going to be a long day again - and i hate feeling the way i do today, work has been a blessing but its not it that's making me feel this way. i am overcome with a great feeling of sadness, a feeling that something's missing and i need to find it.

i think i need to take some time off right now. i need some time away from multiply or facebooking. i've been too distracted lately and i should focus on the more important things that i've been putting off.

so there, a self-imposed hiatus from it all. one solid month starting tomorrow.

happiness in a short letter

i finally found the time to write a short note to my sponsor child at WORLD VISION a couple of weeks back via e-mail (yeah, i so hate doing the snail mail thing) and was pleasantly surprised to receive a letter a few days ago. the letter read :

dear mr. jay santos,

masayang araw sa inyo. ako po si isang grade 3 pupil. masayang mag-aaral at gusto kong makatapos sa pag-aaral. malapit lang ang school sa amin. maglalakad ako araw araw. bilang panganay na anak, ako ay tumutulong sa gawin sa bahay at nag-aalaga sa aking mga kapatid. kadalasan naming pagkain ay gulay at isda. paborito kong laro ay basketball. ako ay masaya at may sponsor na. salamat po sa inyong tulong. maraming salamat po.

your sponsored child,

reading my sponsored child's letter reminded me how blessed i am to be living this carefree, comfortable life. honestly, there is a sense of fulfillment for being able to contribute back to society no matter how small or insignificant it seems.

if you have PHp 600 a month to spare, i encourage you to sponsor a child.

see here for details: Sponsor a Child through World Vision

we can make a difference!

iTouch

i've been trying to decide which gadget would be perfect to store my photo collection and the best i've come across was apple's iphone. now with me probably never going the iphone way, i was looking at the iTouch instead. i was really happy when a good (and one of my oldest) friends decided to give me one as a present. thanks dale! we've been friends a long time and you know you are one of my oldest, dearest and most treasured friends.

so far, i'm quite happy playing around with my 32GB iTouch! yay!

mj@23 : killabot performances

one of the pretty lame things about hanging out with the killabotz is that they're not only a good looking bunch of individuals but they're rich in talent as well.  we can't all be entertainers but these two - jm and lem - showed us that not only are they killabot models, they can also carry a tune.  its too bad i don't have videos of eco and his "man in the mirror" number or even brian's "half-crazy" which is my new favorite song of the moment.  i gotta be ready next time.

jm's seem at home with i-axe's "ako'y sa 'yo, ika'y akin" which he sings to the delight of the crowd.  you can hear at the background how insane the catcalls are and what kind of crazy peeps mj has surrounded himself with.

here, to the surprise of everyone is our very own master photographer, lemon estiva showing us what makes him a true killabotz.  he sings james ingram's "just once" like it was his own and like i said, the flawless performances is probably because he has sung this song a hundred times since the time magic sing was invented.  but yeah, lem was AWESOME here!

sorry i wasn't able to take a video of mj's performances ... there's other videos i could post but because i value my life, let's just say, we'll put those in cold storage ... for now!

if you love the videos, show JM and LEMON some love in the comments section!

> wanna do something great this year?

SPONSOR A CHILD THROUGH WORLD VISION

It only takes P600 a month or P7,200 annually to make a difference in the life of one child (for Sponsors residing outside the Philippines US $20.00 per month).
Your regular contributions will be pooled together with other World Vision resources so the children, families and communities may enjoy the following benefits:

* access to education, good health and nutrition
* values formation child rights protection
* children’s participation in decision-making process
* skills and leadership training; and
* community development projects

By sponsoring poor children through World Vision's Child Sponsorship Program you will be able to give them a chance to have a bright future.

http://www.worldvision.org.ph/index.php

If you want to share your blessings by sponsoring a child, call 372-7777.  Tell them my good friend JM Lago referred you.  Your donations can be deducted from your credit card (gift points!!!) or you can pay through PDC or through bayadcentre outlets.

I am going to start sponsoring come May after i have sorted out my accounts.  Tara, let's share our blessings.  One good deed comes back a hundred fold.

> i'm feelin' you

have you noticed how fortunate we are to come across people at the exact moment we need them in our lives?  people really do come into our lives for a reason - and no matter how long or short they stay, they will always be treasured.  i only hope that i have done my part in the lives of those people i have crossed paths with - and if i have made a difference in their lives, that is probably the best gift of all.  i will never be anybody famous but to be remembered by the people whose lives i've touched in this short, short lifetime is good enough.

to the people in my life, i'm feelin' you!  life is good because of YOU!

> "voltage" experience

to say that VOLTAGE was fun is an understatement.

Voltage was a success.

despite the intensifying heat of the summer, quite a number of people trooped to MJC studio to participate in the latest project of the talented MJ Cachero.  after Le Vampire, we were wondering what sort of shoot he was going to come out with next and seeing the print ads for Voltage made the wait all the more worth it.  Voltage is unlike any project i've seen before.  its imaginative, creative and quite literaly a breakthrough.

this project has been in our calendars from the time our good friend MJ released the posters.  and despite us having no intentions of getting our pictures taken, we wanted to be there to support him.  what made the event fun was hanging out with good friends and finally seeing "online" people you only chance upon in multiply in the flesh.  it was a chance to mingle with very talented people - models, photographers, make-up artists, and hairstylits.  people who hopefully i will get the chance to work with in the future as i pursue this fascinating world of photography.  we brought food that actually complemented the stuffed bread eco was hawking throughout the day which i'd have to say were very delicious.  eco, props to you for your entreprenerial spirit.  you are definitely going to go places.

mj dabbled between being serious and not so serious.  people skills definitely on overdrive.  it was fun to see him in action basking in the success of yet another project.  he smiles more now you know.  hopefully because we're such a fun posse our infectious laughter is rubbing off on him.  there were a lot of well-wishers and fellow photographers who went there to support the project - us included.  it was nice to see them make time to drop by and check the shoot out.

in between, mj even managed to prepare six of his much talked about roasted chicken.  over wine and pizza and the yummy chicken, we had a blast talking about everything and nothing.  it was the perfect way to cap the night away.

NOTE : Photos used in the collage is courtesy of our talented friend, Ron Ibay.

the other side of me

there are two things right now that i am quite passionate about - first obviously is photography and the other is cooking.  and since i've sort of talked about photography to no end in previous blogs (and in the absence of nothing better to do right now), i'll talk little about my culinary explorations.  now by no means am i an experienced cook nor would i go around talking about how great the last dish i cooked because far be from it, my cooking are mostly just trying out recipes i read about.  and yes, my favorite magazine is "Yummy" and i have back issues of that while i don't have a single issue of any photography magazine in print.

i'm a big fan of quick meals, little preparation but still awesome results.  i've even adapted some of the recipes - moroccan fish with mango salsa (my personal fave) and even tried to great results that gonzaga barbecue i saw in a magazine.  lately, i've been hung up on pasta and i've tried a number of sauces that are quite good - bolognese (from a friend's recipe), meat sauce (mom's recipe), herbed tuna (friend's recipe) and seafood with basil cream (its good but there's cream hahaha).

today, i finally got all the ingredients to make pesto from scratch.  it wasn't really hard to work it and i didn't even try to blend them by hand opting instead to use a decent electric chopper to actually good results.  i threw in a handful of shrimps and scallops over whole wheet spaghettini and voila, instant dinner.  i think it took less than 30 mins to do all that and there's a whole lot more of pesto left for a good number of meals the coming days.  yay.

> Must Read : Rules of Relationships (According to Bob Ong)

i got this from Homer Cudel's facebook notes.  it was downright funny but at the same time speaks volumes about how true these statements are.  hope he doesn't mind my re-posting here.  credit also to bob ong.  

love, fundamentally, has a way of screwing us over if we are not careful.  those who are so fixated about getting into a relationship should read this.  its not all roses when you're in one, it takes a lot of work.

1). 'Kung hindi mo mahal ang isang tao, wag ka nang magpakita ng motibo para mahalin ka nya..'

2). 'Huwag mong bitawan ang bagay na hindi mo kayang makitang hawak ng iba.'

3). 'Huwag mong hawakan kung alam mong bibitawan mo lang.'

4). 'Huwag na huwag ka hahawak kapag alam mong may hawak ka na.'

5). 'Parang elevator lang yan eh, bakit mo pagsisiksikan ung sarili mo kung walang pwesto para sayo. Eh meron naman hagdan, ayaw mo lang pansinin.'

6). 'Kung maghihintay ka nang lalandi sayo, walang mangyayari sa buhay mo.. Dapat lumandi ka din.'

7). 'Pag may mahal ka at ayaw sayo, hayaan mo. Malay mo sa mga susunod na araw ayaw mo na din sa kanya, naunahan ka lang.'

8). 'Hiwalayan na kung di ka na masaya. Walang gamot sa tanga kundi pagkukusa.'

9). 'Pag hindi ka mahal ng mahal mo wag ka magreklamo. Kasi may mga tao rin na di mo mahal pero mahal ka.. Kaya quits lang.'

10). 'Kung dalawa ang mahal mo, piliin mo yung pangalawa. Kasi hindi ka naman magmamahal ng iba kung mahal mo talaga yung una.'

11). 'Hindi porke't madalas mong ka-chat, kausap sa telepono, kasama sa mga lakad o ka-text ng wantusawa eh may gusto sayo at magkakatuluyan kayo. Meron lang talagang mga taong sadyang friendly, sweet, flirt, malandi, pa-fall o paasa.'

12). 'Huwag magmadali sa babae o lalaki. Tatlo, lima , sampung taon, mag-iiba ang pamantayan mo at maiisip mong hindi pala tamang pumili ng kapareha dahil lang maganda o nakakalibog ito. Totoong mas mahalaga ang kalooban ng tao higit sa anuman. Sa paglipas ng panahon, maging ang mga crush ng bayan nagmumukha ding pandesal, maniwala ka.'

13). 'Minsan kahit ikaw ang nakaschedule, kailangan mo pa rin maghintay, kasi hindi ikaw ang priority.'

14). 'Mahirap pumapel sa buhay ng tao. Lalo na kung hindi ikaw yung bida sa script na pinili nya.'

15). 'Alam mo ba kung gaano kalayo ang pagitan ng dalawang tao pag nagtalikuran na sila? Kailangan mong libutin ang buong mundo para lang makaharap ulit ang taong tinalikuran mo.'

16). 'Mas mabuting mabigo sa paggawa ng isang bagay kesa magtagumpay sa paggawa ng wala'

17). 'Hindi lahat ng kaya mong intindihin ay katotohan, at hindi lahat ng hindi mo kayang intindihin ay kasinungalingan'

18). 'Kung nagmahal ka ng taong di dapat at nasaktan ka, wag mong sisihin ang puso mo. Tumitibok lng yan para mag-supply ng dugo sa katawan mo. Ngayon, kung magaling ka sa anatomy at ang sisisihin mo naman ay ang hypothalamus mo na kumokontrol ng emotions mo, mali ka pa rin! Bakit? Utang na loob! Wag mong isisi sa body organs mo ang mga sama ng loob mo sa buhay! Tandaan mo: magiging masaya ka lang kung matututo kang tanggapin na hindi ang puso, utak, atay o bituka mo ang may kasalanan sa lahat ng nangyari sayo, kundi IKAW mismo!'

uncertainties

there's 70 days left before april 30 and quite honestly, i haven't really given much thought to what i should do next.  what i'm certain of is that i need to start working soon after except that right now, i'm enjoying the freedom i have to be able to focus on my photography, go out with friends and just lay down and relax.  i know this feeling should be short-lived because i need to do the practical thing but having worked for more than 13 years straight makes me feel like i deserve a breather.  there are some job prospects from a few headhunters out there but quite honestly, i haven't put much effort in submitting my resume and initiating my applications.  golly, i think i've become a lazy s-o-b!  i think what is putting me off having to do it is because i'm excited to bring to fruition some concept shoots me & my friends have been toying with - and it always make me giddy just thinking about it. yes, this photography and the friends that came with it has got me hooked.

i should put try to start thinking about business opportunities.  in my limited reading, history teaches us that there are a lot of people who profited from a recession because they were smart and they hit it right business-wise.  maybe i can be one of the lucky ones and i can think of something profitable - we'll have to see how this pans out.  right now, all i can think about is beefing up my photoshop skills and doing more shoots.  gaaahhh, i'm addicted. somebody really has to slap me hard on the face -- any volunteers?

the other thing i'd like to do is travel ... already i'm booked to coron and ilocos.  and i'm so tempted to join this backpacking trip to indochina in july (thailand-cambodia-vietnam) ... that will be an adventure.  just thinking about it is making me excited.  so many things i can do with my free time - learn a new language, take up culinary ... man, the list goes on and on.

i hope i win the lottery.  then i wouldn't have to work again.

> Register Now : VOLTAGE by MJ Cachero

Its official.  VOLTAGE is here!

If you want to get a well-themed, well-polished photo of yourself from the very talented MJ Cachero, then you should join this one-day photoshoot.

REGISTER NOW!

Visit MJ Cachero's site to check out his beautiful portfolio!

http://mjcachero.multiply.com/

all the more reason to see transformers 2

is this cool of what? 'nuff said!

*caught this in one of the posts in multiply and decided to post this for people in my network.

2009 Do List

i don't remember drafting some resolution list for 2009 but taking my cue from a good friend's list of things to do in 2009, here's my own.

• list of places to go (back to) this 2009 (hope i get to see half) : sydney, ilocos (vigan, bangui, pagudpod), coron, cambodia (angkor wat baby!) ... where else? camsur (been dying to wakeboard), pinatubo crater
• go to the gym.  i really really need to get serious. period.
• learn a new language.  can i still fit this in 2009?  mi habla espanyol!
• enroll in a short culinary course.  while this probably doesn't go well with going to the gym, by golly cooking is another thing i love.  i'll cook for the fam & friends - help them get fat.
• (OC alert!) Tag almost 100GB worth of mp3s. Rip a box ful of CD's to mp3. Transfer them to my ipod.  Logic states then that i should replace my 30GB ipod with the 120GB version.  yahoo, that's what you call justified purchase.
• Read a plethora of e-books about photography i downloaded.  Read a bunch of books gathering dust i've never found the time to read.  Maybe try reading a few of the almost 30GB worth of x-men comics i downloaded.
• I need to go back to my derma.  Get a facial.
• Get rid of these braces.  Its been too long.  More than i bargained for.  I'm beginning to HATE it.
• Shoot. Shoot. Shoot.  Enroll in a lighting class or make kulit my photog friends to teach me.  Learn more photoshop.  Practice. Practice. Practice.
• Get back in touch with my Catholic teachings & practices.
• Find a new job!  Life will be so much better if i find a new job quickly!

Wow, so many things ... so little time talaga.  its a BIG list ... one step at a time.  I'll make it.

in preparation for april 30

its a good thing that a dose of  nyquil and dayquil managed to halt the flu that could've had me feeling sickly the whole week.  i was specially fortunate since i had to go to the office in faraway cavite today.  i was almost resigned not going today because maynilad hasn't restored our water supply when i chanced upon the 5-gallon mineral water jug we had and decided it was well worth it to use that as bath water (lol!).

the reality that i am counting down the days to my inevitable exit to this firm i have been part of for the last decade seems more real today.  we've discussed most of the really important things as to pay, retirement, benefits and clearances. i am quite happy that the big blue is also going the extra mile of providing us with career transition services.  there are a bunch of trainings that will be available (financial, entreprenerial, resume writing), other opportunities (for franchising, business ventures) and they even invited people from DOLE (department of labor & employment) and TESDA to tell us what their programs are.  There are also livelihood trainings (basic cooking, juice puree, basic pc troubleshooting, call center, etc etc) that you can sign-up for.  I should sign-up at TESDA for some massage training hahaha  its free anyway.

i realized though that with leaving comes an abundance of other responsibilities - like continuing to pay for your SSS, Pag-Ibig and Phil-health.  A bunch of legalities that i've had very little interest in to begin with.  this is the part of being a grown-up that i don't like but i have to learn.

april 30 is really lapit na.  i need to really jump start the job hunting soon.  i'll be able to breathe easier if i get a replacement job soon.

> across the universe (feat eco dela sala)

We decided to catch the last staging of "Across the Universe" at the Albertus Magnus Auditorium in UST to support our good friend Eco who topbills the play as Jude.  We already knew Eco had a voice with some of his videos posted in multiply but it was unbelievable to see him sing live in front of a full-packed auditorium.  This guy just has it down pat - and we bow our heads in shameless jealousy.

Congratulations Hector dela Sala.  Like what Lemon said, impressive performance!  (insert applause here!)  Special thanks to Hannah and the rest of the staff because they gave us really good seats and all of them were very accommodating.  Everyone was super nice!

The best part of it all was sharing the night with really great friends - the ever-popular heartbreakers "the killabotz" - lem, mj, brian, jm and marjo, gorgeous ladies - malou & ohsie, new friend jeremy and the very helpful & accommodating dino dimar.  we sat through a couple of hours of beatles songs that helped me realize why the beatles is considered one of music's great bands.  the songs were fantastic - across the universe, all my loving, i've just seen face, strawberry fields to name a few.  there were indeed fun moments in the play when we were laughing really hard ("we want charice!") and irritable moments as some photographers shamelessly flashed-filled their pictures.  if that flash-thing in men-in-black was real, i'll probably won't have any memories of last night anymore, or of my whole childhood for that matter.

We also saw eco's ever-sweet mom & groovy lola along with eco's other friends we've met during the "share a smile 2" charity project a couple of weeks back - jan, sammie & anjo.  a whole of eco's friends obviously were there last night to support him.

Dinner at shakey's was even more fun.  we were all pretty famished after the show and pigging out seemed like a logical thing to do.  the conversations were funnier this time because most were pretty much at eased already with each other.  poor bunsong marjo though looked starved post-braces attachment.  JM & Brian were the guys to beat in chow territory (but it seemed like kuya lemon finished the carbonara) - you gotta love being young with a fired-up metabolism.  di bale, tataba din kayo ... you'll see (ok, that's me sourgraping).  still, hanging out with these guys is always a BLAST.  can't help but love 'em cause they're so friend-worthy.  Thanks Eco for the pasalubong.

Here's a couple of videos of Eco's performance - "All My Loving" and "I've Just Seen Face."

More photos courtesy of Lem Estiva at this link : Across the Universe (with eco dela sala)

Photos & Video Cover/Montage courtesy of the super talented Lem Estiva.  Used with permission. The videos are a bit shaky since i was just using a P&S camera and i was trying to cover the LCD so as not to disturb the other people watching the show.  No further editing done except for titles & credits.

he would have been 31 today

Happy Birthday Abet!

You would have been 31 today if you haven't left us so early.  I can't believe it'll be six years this year.  You really changed a lot of us after what happened.  I guess tragedy really brings people closer together and we are because of you.  I'm really happy to say that after you left, i've learned to appreciate each day that i live and breathe.  Its one of the reasons you will always be remembered, because in the short time i've known you i have learned a great deal about living.

If you were here, i bet we would be having a party - you know the kind that we used to have when everyone of the intel ka-berks were together.  We probably would be anxiously waiting for the clock to strike 4pm today - have dinner and get tipsy with everyone not minding its a monday today.  besides, we've all done that before - monday drinking sprees, all of us staring blankly at the walls of our cubicles the following day.  who cares right?  its your birthday and we're gonna partee!

its a nice celebration right?  except you're not here anymore.