dear fish,
i read a blog today about this guy who was seriously in love with his sister's bestfriend for the longest time. the girl just saw him as "kuya" and so he turned to blogging to air out his feelings of unrequited love along with the pains that went with it. jeff (the guy) was very articulate in his blog entries, sometimes funny and sometimes downright serious that you'd be instantly hook to his sad love story. reading jeff's blog made my day so much that i couldn't stop thinking how similar and different my (love) life is compared to him.
i think one of the great tragedies in life is pining for someone who could never love you back the way you want to in return. i guess the truth is that fairy tales and happy ever afters do not really happen that often in real life. and the real truth is that, like me, there are a lot of people whose heart breaks everyday. if you ask how painful unrequited love is, i would tell you there is really no words to describe it - you just all of a sudden feel a vast emptiness inside you, a deep longing and an overwhelming feeling of sadness. that's how you make me feel most of the time.
i know i should fold (poker term) soon. there are really no more cards left to play, it has been a losing hand from the beginning but i decided to gamble a bit just to see where it takes me. i should have folded while i had the chance and now i feel desperate for a way out.
tama sila, life's a bitch. move on.
desperately seeking,
yuan*
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