the wave of depression hit me smack in the face last tuesday. i guess all those negative energies spewing out of van, jona and some other people i know were downright infectious. i woke up today still with that glum look on my face not looking forward to another work day. somewhere inside i knew things weren't going to be different from the last two days.
is this really going to be a cycle? no matter how brief this period lasts, its quite emotionally draining and it feels like my head is going to explode from all the chaotic nonsense i'm trying to process. i wish i had my happy pill this week. i wish not having my happy pill this week was just a brief respite and it doesn't spell the end of my endorphin fix. right now, i'm in SPA mode (self-pity again). trying to remain cheerful though. silver lining - not smiling does good at keeping the wrinkles at bay. still a win-win scenario then.
last written exam tomorrow but i still have to go through a hundred pages of review materials. no math here which is what i am good at. if this was essay, i probably will breeze through it. i learned that writing about your actual experiences/scenarios in graduate school always beats the theoretical mumbo-jumbo. 'Cause hey, this is for real, concepts in action - no beating that. 100 pages. read half of it. very little recollection.
wishin' the cloud of gloom lifts soon. iinom na lang ito.
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