restless nights

its funny that yesterday i was already exhausted when i got home but still didn't really feel the need to hit the sack up until it was 11pm. despite that, my trip to la-la land was interrupted sometime around 230am and so i decided to turn on the tv and surf the channels. i finally found "sneakers" showing in one of the channels so i decided to watch it until i drift back to sleep. "sneakers" is an old robert redford movie which also featured the late river phoenix and is about a group of people who tests company security measures by actually breaking into it by stealing. then they get caught up in a conspiracy, blah blah blah ... its actually a very good movie, great plot and is very entertaining. i think i finally managed to go back to sleep sometime around 430am. ugh! i honestly don't know what's keeping me restless at night for the past few days. just one more week left here in az and i am going back. yay!

thanks to all my friends who have taken the time to ask how i've been doing or whether i was ok. thanks to trixy also for writing me a long but poignant e-mail. long IM's & YM's to talk about the current state of sadness i am in. they are all helping. i am glad i have friends to share my stories with, probably cry on when i get back and help me get out of the rut i dug myself into. damn, i need some more things to keep myself busy. busy means less thinking, and less thinking means less of mcbaby. and definitely, less is best when it comes to mcbaby.

i should shop. shopping has always been good therapy. i'm staring at my luggages right now wondering if i can fit maybe another pair of shoes hmmm ugh 1 more jeans or a couple of shirts?
damn that 50 kilo limit - that really sucks.